realz

hey there delilah what's it like in new york city?

idk either I haven't been there. but ignoring my lame-o monologue.

the reason we've gathered here today! (and yeah, I need a reason. otherwise, it feels pointless. not that it doesn't WITH a reason.)

okay. do you have a thing you like doing? like, a hobby. or maybe something bigger. it can be all-encompassing, be something reaaaally small, it doesn't matter. anyways. i'll use a hobby of mine that i picked up recently as an example, mmk?

alright. well, i enjoy guitar, it's a fun way to spend my time. and, me being myself, I definitely want to the very best I can at it. as in, I want to be better than kid A or kid B over here or there, y'know? well. it's a hell of a hard truth to come to terms with, but being top dog isn't as easy as it looks.

HAHA, I bet you're thinking, WTF?
okay. idk if it's like this for you out there, buuut when you do stuff, stuff you like, stuff you think is your own; don't you just want to be amazing at it? just, reaaally good.

but the thing is, you're not the only person out there. people your age, your grade, etc etc, have already discovered what you found and thought was your own little thing, and it kinda feels like that it's impossible to cross the gap. another example, you ready? some guy I was creeping on facebook, (it was on the suggested friends list, i'm no creeper. NO LIE) had a couple pictures of him snowboarding, right? and riding is another thing i'm into. more into than guitar, and it's just fun to do. and he was doing an indy or sommat. that's like, a kind of grab, for you uncultured ones. anyways. I can't do one. cause. yknow. I'm unstretchy. well, that's just an excuse, but whatever. okay. this guy has been riding since he was 7. damn. like, I started when I was.. what? 12? so yeah. it feels like he's ahead in this non-existant(big word, ohemgee) race. and what can I do? he has, what, 7/8/9(?) years of experience compared to my measly 2/3. and it's just kinda sad, yeah? bah this is like word diarrhea again, just with some extra self-pity, yes? hahahaha.

the phrase "there's always someone better" i don't like. it's definitely true, but eh. the peak is where it's at, in my opinion. :P
quoting Ricky Bobby, a fictional dood, 'if you ain't first, you're last.'

that's it, I guess. I lost the train. sorry!

oh and,
moose hats are amaaaaaa-ZING.